Privacy Policy

This is the privacy policy for It is a fusion of boilerplate legalese and my own interjections. Bottom line – we aren’t here to exploit your personal information, but we do carry advertising and sell things. These activities demand some diligence on our part and on yours.

What information do we collect?

You may visit our site anonymously.

We collect personal information from you only when and if you place an order for merchandise offered directly by (i.e. a book or maybe some toy trains). When ordering on our site you may be asked to enter your: name, e-mail address, mailing address, phone number and credit card information. Actually, PayPal collects this information from you and sends some of it to us so that we may process the order. We never even see your credit card information, as PayPal takes care of all that stuff. PayPal displays a link to their privacy policy on the checkout page. At the time of this policy’s creation, the PayPal policy could be accessed here.

Please note that the above paragraph only applies to merchandise purchased directly from us. Midnight Buffet merchandise offered through CafePress is subject to their legalese. If you click on an advertisement (i.e. Google Ad, Sears, etc.), we are totally out of the loop and know nothing of what transpires between you and the merchant. We like it that way…

Like most websites, we use cookies and/or web beacons to enhance your experience and track visits to our website. Please refer to the ‘do we use cookies?’ section below for information about cookies and how we use them.

What do we use your information for?

Any of the information we collect from you may be used in one of the following ways:

• To process transactions

Your information, whether public or private, will not be sold, exchanged, transferred, or given to any other company for any reason whatsoever, without your consent, other than for the express purpose of delivering the purchased product or service requested.

• To send order-related emails

The email address you provide for order processing will only be used to send you information and updates pertaining to your order.

We’re only talking about here – PayPal and CafePress mey have other uses as outlined in their policies.

How do we protect your information?

We (PaypPal, CafePress) offer the use of a secure server for transaction processing. All supplied sensitive/credit information is transmitted via Secure Socket Layer (SSL) technology and then encrypted into a database only to be accessible by those authorized with special access rights (which does not include us) to such systems, and are required to keep the information confidential.

After a transaction, your private information (credit cards, social security numbers, financials, etc.) will be managed according to the policies of the transaction processor. Remember, we at never have access to that information.

Do we use cookies?

Yes. Cookies are small files that a site or its service provider transfers to your computers hard drive through your Web browser (if you allow) that enables the sites or service providers systems to recognize your browser and capture and remember certain information.

We use cookies to help us remember and process the items in your shopping cart and keep track of advertisements.

If you prefer, you can choose to have your computer warn you each time a cookie is being sent, or you can choose to turn off all cookies via your browser settings. Like most websites, if you turn your cookies off, some of our services may not function properly.


Since we post Google Ads on our site, Google would like us to make you aware of some specifics.

  • Google, as a third party vendor, uses cookies to serve ads on our site.
  • Google’s use of the DART cookie enables it to serve ads to your users based on their visit to our site and other sites on the Internet.
  • Users may opt out of the use of the DART cookie by visiting the Google ad and content network privacy policy.

The National Advertising Initiative suggests this wording: “We use third-party advertising companies to serve ads when you visit our website. These companies may use information (not including your name, address, email address, or telephone number) about your visits to this and other websites in order to provide advertisements about goods and services of interest to you.”

This is how the Internet works these days, in case you were unaware.

Do we disclose any information to outside parties?

We do not sell, trade, or otherwise transfer to outside parties your personally identifiable information. Period. However, if we receive a subpoena or threat of some sort, all bets are off.

Non-personally identifiable visitor information may be tracked by advertisers appearing on this site for marketing, advertising, or other uses.

Third party links

Occasionally, at our discretion, we may include or offer third party products or services on our website. These third party sites have separate and independent privacy policies. We therefore have no responsibility or liability for the content and activities of these linked sites. Nonetheless, we seek to protect the integrity of our site and welcome any feedback about these sites.

California Online Privacy Protection Act Compliance

Because we value your privacy we have taken the necessary precautions to be in compliance with the California Online Privacy Protection Act. We therefore will not distribute your personal information to outside parties without your consent. (This exact wording is required for COPPA, but as far as we’re concerned the phrase “without your consent” is superfluous)

Childrens Online Privacy Protection Act Compliance

We are in compliance with the requirements of COPPA (Childrens Online Privacy Protection Act), we do not collect any information from anyone under 13 years of age. Our website, products and services are all directed to people who are at least 13 years old or older.

Online Privacy Policy Only

This online privacy policy applies only to information collected through our website and not to information collected offline. (So, if we meet on a cruise ship and you give us your social security number, I guess we’d be free to sell it to the highest bidder – but we wouldn’t do that no matter what this policy allows.)

Terms and Conditions

Terms and conditions apply to transactions made through other vendors and are governed by their documents. Inscribed copies of What Time Is the Midnight Buffet purchased directly from are not returnable.

Your Consent

By using our site, you consent to our privacy policy.

Changes to our Privacy Policy

If we decide to change our privacy policy, we will post those changes on this page.

This policy was last modified on 3/22/2009

Privacy Policy Created by Free Privacy Policy and Chester(h)

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